It had been a loooong night. Thanks to the joys of co-sleeping my youngest had woken me several times to give me a love-head butt, once to the nose. I woke up with a banging headache and couldn’t breath through what I’m sure was dried blood. Hubby cheerfully exclaimed ‘I managed to get him back to sleep last night’ and I snapped back ‘what do you want a thank you?!’ We’ve been together 10 years now, hubby can spot the verge of a mommy melt down from a mile off. He sprung into action and took the kids out so I could have the morning off.
I go to a play group where one mom in particular seems on the edge of a melt down, every week. She miraculously arrives with 4 kids bathed, dressed and in one piece at 9.30am. It all goes down hill from there, or so I assume, because every week I see her dragging those 4 kids out of play group early screaming (and I mean screaming) ‘get in the car you kids don’t listen to me we are never coming back to play group again!’ Next week – same deal.
I applaud this mom. Every week she comes back. She does it again. She could stay home and turn on the TV but she drags herself and her crew out of the house and tries once more. She may feel like she’s not doing the best job,standing in the parking lot loosing her cool, but I hope she knows the moms around her aren’t judging her. I just wish she could have some time for herself.
If ever someone mentions to me a mom losing it with her kids my first question is ‘Does she have support? Does she need a break?’. Kids are tough, even at the best of times. They require all of you when they are small. I’ve heard it said a million times but I’m going to say it again here…moms need breaks. When you are tired and you never get a moment to yourself patience can quickly diminish. Small defiances, little mistakes and endless nagging can mount up to something more than you can handle. It’s impossible to give of yourself when there’s nothing left to give.
On my day off I went against my initial instinct, clean the house, and used my morning to shop (read actually try on clothes without small people opening the door and exposing me to passers by). I bought my first bakini in 3 years, I must have lost my damn mind, I blame the freedom. I had a cup of coffee while it was still hot and actually got to eat my biscuit. Oh and I bought craft supplies to make my boys personalised Christmas teddies, I suddenly missed them and wanted to do something special. Because I was no longer on the edge of a mommy meltdown and once again had something left to give.